When Lamed shows up in our lives it's a time to take action, just do something. But it's also reminding us that we teach and learn. So whenever we are doing something we are learning from the experience, as well as teaching others from the experience.
This morning I was awakened early from a dream where someone was talking to me about understanding. I got up to go to the bathroom and asked, "What is understanding really?" When I get back into the bed I realized that Dwayne has all the blankets on his side. When I try to pull the blankets over on to me his arm clinches the blankets even harder. I didn't want to wake him so I grab a little thin cover that I keep at the foot of the bed. As I laid there thinking that the cover felt cool, yet comforting I began to reflect on the whole understanding.
While reflecting I thought about Dwayne and the covers and a voice from within said, "He would not have done that if he was awake right now and knew that you needed covers." This experience allowed me to understand that "understanding" is awareness. When we are conscious, meaning awake, we understand the needs of others and are more than willing to assist. Understanding is the ability to be awake so as to know our own actions and how they are affecting our reality.
With Dwayne being asleep he did not have an understanding of what was going on, nor did he care. Not out of selfish reasons, he was just asleep. We need to remember this when we call people ignorant or stupid. It's not that they are ignorant and/or stupid they just don't understand how to be awake. The nice thing is this, everyone will eventually understand. We all "learn" (lamed) to do this via our senses, especially our emotions.
So as I meditated on Lamed this morning I asked about understanding again. I could see the image in my head of Lamed and could see how it appeared to be rising all on its own. Then I heard a funny story in my head. The story is talking about the creation of earth and God sits back and says, "Aw yes, this is good."
It was then I thought, OMG did God not know that it was good before He created it? Then it hit me in what Lamed was trying to say. That sometimes we just need to start something in order to see that it's all good. That living life is about initiating life. And that to truly understand ourselves we must be willing, ready and able to jump with both feet and then look back and say, "Aw yes, this was good."
So Lamed is asking us to take a leap of faith. It's letting us know that through our experiences we gain understanding, we wake up. But also when we are awake is when we experience the understanding. When we are awake we do things because our hearts tells us to.
This morning I could have been angry that Dwayne had robbed me of my cover, but instead I found the lesson in being awake. I found the purpose of the covers in that I can't hide anymore. God is asking me to not to cover up my life but to understand it. Through this understanding I know I will, one day, receive wisdom. I'm sure my higher self will let me know what that's really about too.
But for now I am content with knowing that understanding is through experience and that I just need to take some form of direction in my life. That doesn't mean you plan out your whole life today, it just means do something today towards your over all goal.
My goal today is to make Christmas goodies for everyone, the make homemade Christmas Cards and jewelry for my family. There is nothing better than a homemade, handcrafted gift. Another goal is to watch as many Christmas movies as possible while making, baking and cleaning today. My house will be full of the Christmas spirit and smells of a winter feast.
Today will be a different Shabbot for Dwayne and I. We will snuggle up with our winter blankets tonight and share stories of our day while drinking hot tea and watching the Christmas specials coming on TV tonight. We will share our time together in reflection for the things we are so thankful for while sharing our love for one another in our understanding of being awake.
You see, your love is deeper and more rich when you are awake in understanding.
Belief Statement: My life is so rich with experience and life and this feels joyful. I know that each day is a journey into learning more and teaching more. I gain awareness while losing confusion.
Spirit Statement: Life is rich with experiences in joy knowing the journey is learning and teaching awareness with confidence.
Love, Velvete
