Today's meditation is to be on the Hebrew letter Bet/Beit. As I began my meditation I quickly glanced at the letter and realized how it appeared to be like a mouth wide open. This was very appropriate for this letter because it's the letter of receiving.
I said my little prayer and realized that I was starting to feel like maybe there was something to be afraid of. I stopped and said that God is love and light. It was then I heard a voice share with me that our illusions of fear is what is keeping us from totally receiving Gods Love.
In the moment I thought about this and thought wow, how many times have I been fearful of what I was getting to receive that just stopped the process all together. But then the voice said that that has never happened, it's only been impeded. That we have received the gift somewhere else in our life that was more comfortable for us. This made since because it's much easier for us to receive a bonus from work because we think it's due to us rather than winning the lottery.
When this thought came to me then the voice said, "It's been out of your selfishness that your receiving has also been limited." When I began to think about that statement I ponder how I was selfish. It quickly came to me that we are selfish even when we see others in lack from ourselves. When we feel that we know what is best for an individual rather than allowing them their life. So if you want to win a lottery to make someone else life better that is for a selfish reason. You may not think so and may think this would be the most unselfish thing to do, but the motive behind it is not pure. Plus, we do not know what the plan is for another. We don't know that a situation that they are experiencing them won't bring them great joy in the end. It's all an illusion anyway. So to want to win something to end someones suffering is truly only a reason for you to believe in the illusion even more. And what you are saying is you want to end your suffering, so be it! Then you will end your suffering by not winning the lottery. You see?
After all that was said and done my mind took me straight to a time when I was a small child. My baby sister looked to be 2-3 years of age standing in her crib, my middle sister was sitting next to me and I was holding my lunch box, just admiring it. I must have been 5-6 years of age because I remember school as well. But this must have been a weekend.
I'm sitting there on my bed looking around and then my dad comes in. He looks at us all and then he leaves the room and we continue to play. The reason that I was taken to that time was to show me what was real. I had blamed my parents for locking into that room and not letting us out. I never tried to get out of any room and couldn't in my waking state. Then I see myself walking down the hallway to this room that I was just in and there's a lock on the outside of the door instead of the inside. It was then that I made the assumption that I was "locked" in my room. I remember seeing that lock as clear as day.
Then I realized that at that moment was when I closed myself off from receiving. Everything seemed to be a struggle. At age 6 life should be fun, which I'm sure parts of it were, but it was at this age I started thinking about everything. Before then I was just a 6 year old admiring her lunch box sitting in a room with her sisters. We had stuff everywhere. I always remembered so much stuff. But there were three of us and all three of us were different in how we kept up with our stuff.
As a sleep walker that was found in someone elses house one morning, I'm sure my parent had to have the lock on the outside to protect me. My dad was probably coming into the room because he heard us up and wanted to be sure the door was unlocked just in case we needed out.
Shortly after I had this awareness the kitty liter box went off. It was trying to scoop up the poo but they had so much in there all at one time that it was taking several times for it to get it to the receptacle. It never made it and I realized I was going to have to help it out. It was then that I realized truly what the spirit was saying about our own blocks in not being able to receive.
We are so full of crap sometimes (illusions and beliefs) that we can't receive what's coming into us. This meditation helped me to clear up some beliefs, that weren't true, so that I can be a better receiver.
To be a better receiver we must be able to open the path ways. To want enlightenment or to become a better receiver for any gain other than pure love, light and life will block us. Now love doesn't mean the love of another but of our SELF, the light is your own illumination to what is true, and life is your own life and relationship with the Will of God.
Beit sounds like bet in English. How many times have you said to someone, "I'll bet you......"? This helps you to separate yourself from the other. There is a winner and a loser. In true receiving there is only the winning of surrendering to God's will. Many of us are still scared to death to do that. We fear what is it that God wants me to do. But it's not really that either, it's truly that we are afraid that we can't hold on to the illusions that we've created to keep God away from us. Many people say, if it weren't for bad luck I'd have no luck at all. Well this is the same concept with this as well. "If it weren't for my own misery, I'd have no misery at all." That's all you're wanting. You would rather feel better that you created your illusions, then project them on to others just so that you can feel you've "done" something. So be it! Receive your misery for all that it's worth.
So as we can see that when we become attached to our thoughts we lack the ability to receive. When we wish to remain in thought we now have to create a reason to stay there. So the shadow of Beit is Spiritual superiority. When we feel that we have all the answers, all the keys, and the way. Or if we start telling folks they are crazy and that we are the only one to free them, then we are in the shadow of Beit. How many times have you been to a spiritual teacher or leader that has said those very words? That you've got to keep coming to see them if you want to be fixed. They are in the shadow of Bet. They are trapped within their own mind.
There is a big difference in being like a god and claiming to be a God. Once we operate out of our thoughts that we are God then we lack the ability to receive. Why? Because now you are saying you are superior, you are right, you have the way, you can create all without Gods help. Jesus never went around telling people they were wrong, or that they were crazy, or that they had to do anything other than Love each other. OMG, how simple is that.
Bless someone today.
Belief statement: While in my room I felt content playing with my stuff and felt happy and carefree. When I saw the lock on the door I thought I had been locked in. I gained fear while losing reality.
Spirit statement: In myself I am playing while happy and carefree. I see the door is open to knowing freedom in love is real.
It just doesn't get any better than this.
