Day 132 of 400 "Connections"

Mercury is definitely retrograde right now! What we have to remember about this phase is it's a time for us to reflect, step back and not make any long term decisions. Also be careful of our commitments, what we do on the computer, and any job related task that require long term attention.

This is a time to use the positive aspect of why this time is given to us. The positive in it is to check our work twice. Don't hand anything in to the IRS, courts, or pay on bills during this time. And if you have to do any of these things make sure you take your time and do them slowly and double check them.

I was trying to call my mother this morning to surprise her with a very special message. When she answered the phone I decided to ask her if she had time to listen to something that I heard on the radio. Of course she told me she was on the phone with someone and would call me right back. Well 15 minutes later still no call, so I called her back only to hear her say, "Just tell me what you want real quick." When I said I couldn't do that she insisted that I not take up any more of her time and be done with it and to go ahead and just tell her quickly what I wanted. This hit me to my core. However, it made me realize how many times I, myself, have probably done this to people...and animals. It made me sad to think that I have spent my life discounted people to that degree and wondered what would make any of us so insensitive and tired.

I decided to call my daughter, who I adore and love chatting with, and my mother beeped in. After my conversation with my daughter I listened to the voice mail my mother left. She basically was telling me how busy she was and that every phone was ringing, people coming to the door, and more. Then she said, "You can call me for a brief moment because I'm so busy getting this taken care of this morning. And I hope you're not too bent out of shape because you sounded pretty upset and I hope your day gets better than that." Again, the knife just went deeper into my soul.

I couldn't help how many times I have felt so overwhelmed that I just wanted a break from everything and everyone. But the reality of it is....we can never run from our self. You got it, each and every person that comes in contact with us has the agreement to do just that with us. To bring us awareness and understanding of what we are reflecting into our lives. I ask for each and every person to be in my life because they need me just as much as I need them. I'm not afraid of who I am. I don't put on shows for people to influence others in thinking that I'm better then anyone else. At least I hope not.

Our relationships are important, whether 10 minutes or 10 seconds. Be the light and allow it to reflect in those brief moments of contacts. How important is it to each and everyone of us to impact peoples lives positively? I know I think about it each and everyday. Not only because of the step-father I had in my life, but also the people that supported me in love and light. My Step-Father taught me all too well that people needed to be encouraged and to be given the touch of support and honor. He said that people weren't patted on the back enough in life. I can see this being reflected in our world on a daily basis, but I can also see people trying to do better. If I can do my part in being that kind of leader for people then I know that I will leave this world knowing that I benefited the planet and its people, rather than raping it of all its beauty and love.

So I give gratitude to my mother today with a heavy heart, not because of how she is, but how she has awakened me to how we have made our lives so full with stuff that we forget the relationships. I know her duties are important to her, I know that she has always gotten along better with other people more then her own children, and I know that I have been in my mother's way before. These kinds of things no child should have to go through, but if they experience them then they will either be able to rise above it or become it. Which would you want your child to be?

What did I want with my mother today? Well, I went to the recording studio last night and recorded my song "God Is Love". I wanted my mother to be the first to hear it before I mail it out to everyone. My daughter was really the first one I played it for, but I wanted my mother to be next. However, the joy that I felt in sharing this with her was quickly deflated and the moment lost simply because she could not communicate with me that she was busy and would need to talk to me later that evening. This I would have totally understood and appreciated. I'd must rather have someone answer the phone to say, "Hey, I'm really busy right now but I will call you back." I guess I feel that if I got to talk to my mom everyday that I would have understood her comment to me, but we rarely talk and when we do I feel it's rushed or all about drama. So I guess we need to keep in mind to that we still have choice in who we wish to surround ourselves with and if people don't want to be around you then there is something to think about. LOL You gotta laugh.

Belief Statement: This is a time to reflect and slow down and to feel patient and calm. I know this is difficult at first but it's the natural rhythm of life in gaining awareness and focus.

Spirit Statement: Now be in the flow, patient and calm because the ease and the rhythm of life is awareness and focus.