A Child's Cry

Upon awakening I realized I could not see Red, our very, very pregnant cow. And for some reason I felt I needed to see how she was doing even though I felt she was fine. So as I cleaned the liter pan, cleaned out the fridge and then took the trash out I decided to continue my little walk this morning.

As I neared the shady area where we have cleared for the grandchildren I thought, "Wow, why did we do all of this?" It was easy to answer because Dwayne will tell you he did it all for the grandchildren. When you ask him why we need another calf, llama, or horse he'll tell you, for the grandkids. LOL, you gotta love'm.

So this morning I decided to continue my walk through the wet grass to see the garden, to let the chickens out and to watch the horses eating this morning. As I look out there is Red, with the look of birth all over her face. She's been trying to give birth to this calf now it seems like for a week. Her bag is full, her belly huge, and she takes long moments of pause to feel the contractions that are obvious only to her.

As I'm walking back to the house I look out towards the rolling hills full of trees and life. You can hear the birds singing and the dogs barking. The chickens are now free to roam and the cats are chasing bugs. It was then I was reminded of what my granddaughter said to me when she called me crying last night, "Why aren't you going to watch me play?" Of course the inner part of me ached in hearing these words, but of course we know that all messages are message from God.

Remembering this allowed me to process and realize what I/we had done. We purchased land, got animals, built play areas, gardens and much, much more for the grandchildren. But while doing all of that where were we? We were lost in the doing for others that weren't even going to be around. We were doing for others that we only see every now and then and even then it's at their home not here.

So I questioned this and of course the answer was there all along. "Velvete, your inner child is wanting you to watch it play." You see these things are for us in order to stay connected to our inner child. We can't connect anyone else to nature if that's not what they want, it's only up to us. The experience we were wanting to give to the grandchildren was for our experience.

Now we all know that once we get our message that the end result will quickly fulfill. Does this mean that my granddaughters will come here to see us during a time when we need to stay home in order to take care of the animals that my husband so thoughtfully got for them to experience. Of course not, they have their own lives, their own messages, their own destiny. But does it mean that other children and people will be here to help us celebrate in this inner peacea and joy, absolutely. But only because we are present. This means this land was for us, it was God's gift to us to play in and with. Even as I'm typing this I'm able to look out my office window and see the beautiful wild flowers growing and the joy that is coming from each one of them in celebration.

You see we all have tunnel vision. The love that you give to another is actually the love you are giving to yourself. That love never goes away and no matter how hard this illusion of life seems to make that real, it will never be real. But what God was saying was, "Velvete, your heaven is here and I need you to stay put."

All day yesterday folks asked me if I would be going out of town, perfect strangers. When I said yes, they ALL said, "Be safe of the road." By the third person I started telling myself that I needed to write that down. And then as I'm sewing I get this feeling that was overwhelming, like the hand of God was right on me. I felt protected and loved, never fearful or dreadful, but I did ask what was going on and why was I having this feeling.

It wasn't long after that I was having a conversation with my daughter that brough my attention to something and I realized that God was asking me to stay put. My daughter is the greatest angel and lightworker I know. Her love is permanent and radiates out for all to see. So I know what had to happen last night wasn't easy for her either but it had to be done because God was asking me to stay put.

Of course when we want to go somewhere to be with loved ones God really has to be strong sometimes when we don't listen the first time. I'm sure all of you know what I'm talking about.

It was this morning that I fully could see how the drama that played out is for my own good and that no matter what illusion I have of this physical reality that God is always there loving me. The child within me.

I'm going to miss seeing my grandchildren this weekend. I'm going to miss their kisses and seeing them trying on the dresses I made for them, as I've missed so much of their activities, plays and games. But the reality of it is they have their own destiny, their own lives to live and their own people to be around that will influence their lives to be who they are to become. We all have our own soul lessons in order to evolve. And this is what provides me comfort each and everyday, that I know that they are evolving and growing. I understand that the connection I have with them is the connection I have with my own inner child and that that child requires more of my attention and love in order to be the person I'm to BE.

So just as I wrote yesterday don't let people die in vain, celebrate each life in the lessons they have to offer us, I celebrate with my grandchildren, my daugher and my son-in-law today for the love that they are. The brightness to be who they are without hesitation, without pause and with conviction. We all should be such light bearers of the world.

My day starts today with the inner child within me joyful that I am where I am suppose to be. I don't know why I'm suppose to be here rather than in KS but I know I don't need to know, but rather know that all is for our highest good.

My love never fades, no one can take that away from me, nor can anyone ever take my happiness away from me. Sure there are moments that we feel that an external stimulation is what is making us happy or unhappy but that's not true. And if there was another lesson in the occurrance last night I can honestly say that even though I wondered why I wasn't getting to see my grandchildren I still remained happy.

I remained happy because my inner child was celebrating from the message, and because I knew without a doubt that everyone was growing from the experience. And what if it was only me? It doesn't matter because when one of us experiences a shift we all experience a shift.

So all of you have a blessed day and Happy Mother's Day to all of you.

Love, Velvete