The Creative Force Within

"The structure will be false because the energies have not been transformed which can make it real", The Book of Secrets by Osho. This is so profound because when we look at what we have created we can begin to see what it is we are really afraid of, what it is we are suppressing.

When we are at war with a nation or a people what anger are we suppressing within ourselves, what are we rejecting emotionally that we want to hide deep within the body? It is this very energy that you are keeping hidden within you that is causing you to manifest and materialize the very things you see. "You are just sitting on a volcano, and every moment that volcano is trying to erupt."

As stated on the blog yesterday, when we are angry we no longer are in our rational mind but rather irrational, animal mind. So what about a person that is suppressing his or her anger and isn't allowing it to come forward because they want everyone to see they are doing the "right" thing? This person is a ticking time bomb waiting to go off at any moment. When the bomb goes off at that very moment the person is able to release who they are not and feel the person that they are.

"When the real asserts itself, the false disappears. Only when the real goes back underground does the false come again," Osho. You see you can continue to resist those parts of yourself but all they are doing is controlling you and preventing your creative flow. Some say, "I don't want to say those things because they'll hurt someone," but all they are doing is coming out of alignment with who they really are. They are no longer in integrity!

As stated in the blog "How to Become a Millionaire" this integrity is a key component in realizing and actualizing the self. How will you ever become rich with the blessings from within if you are keeping yourself locked away from all that is, including the animal within you? We are not here to overcome the body, we are not here to just be spirit, we are here to be both and to allow the combination of both to fully express all parts of our being. Start being honest with who you are hiding inside and you'll quickly realize that the person you were hiding wasn't you at all, but rather something that you were denying and by holding on to it you were keeping it real.

While holding on to it you are keeping it real! Wow, can you see how we do that each and everyday of our lives? There is a part of us that hides our anger in order to justify that anger is real. So when we refuse to express our anger what we are really saying is this is real and it's who I am, but nothing could be further from the truth. You, as a spiritual being in an animal body are love. But by deceiving yourself now, "you can create a false structure very easily," TBS.

You can create these false structures in order to validate anger, hate, jealous, greed and the like all exist and can cause harm. When we realize that there are only degrees of each of these things that are waiting creatively to be expressed, not suppressed we now can build a reality that is sustainable in love.

My suppressing of my own greed caused me to become homeless and jobless some time ago in my life. These things I resisted and because of this very resistance I experienced a false reality for myself that was fragile. But then this greed has to swing the other way as well in order for us to see the animal within us. I moved from homelessness to success in just a matter of a few short years, no one was going to make me homeless ever again. But as I moved through having it all I found that I was still hiding something deep within my soul. What was it? God, please help me I didn't want to go back to that stage in my life.

It was then that I realized that what I was experiencing was not real at all but an illusion of the energy that I was keeping alive within me. I realized when I spoke those words that I was projecting my own lack and greed out within the world. I was now seeing through my own eyes the destruction of the need to be successful, wealthy, greedy, giving and more. It was a fine line let me tell you. I stopped being in the moment and moved beyond time in order to create the web of illusions to hold me into place for sometime.

And as I sat out on my rock one night and screamed to the angels to leave me alone I felt the deepest darkness I had ever experienced in my life. I feared everything, I knew not anything, I wanted to get rid of everything, I couldn't communicate with anyone, my services declined, and I felt myself leaving this physical reality and was experiencing a real live death. It took months to see what I had done to myself and as I cried at night no one was there to hear me because I had asked them all to leave. It was only through my own willingness that I am here today with real creative juice running through my veins.

It was in those deep dark moments that I realized I had asked my soul to leave. It was then that I experienced the animal nature of man that I had created, fear! And what I was resisting inside of me, that thing that I had created was now right in front of my face. All my anger, all my fear, all my greed, all my jealous, oh God my jealous and the number of people that I felt within me that I had hurt in one way or another. All bubbling up to the surface in order for me to see what I had done. The years wasted on energy that served only me in getting me what I WANTED. It hurt to my core.

I felt like Job in the bible at that moment because I was in real pain, and suffering all the lose of the illusionary world that I had so finely put together. But then an amazing thing happened. The volcano had erupted and the air was fresh and clean again. I felt a sense of newness, a rebirth you might say. I could feel the joy within my heart again, I could see the spring coming forward and the newness of what was real. MY soul was back, the angels had arrived.

The truth was they never left my side, it was only me that hid myself from them. You see when we resist those parts of us that don't want to take responsibility for what we have created our foundation is shaky and it can and usually does collapse, it might happen in this life or another but it does happen. But when it does welcome it for it is there that you find your power of the creative Source mind and become the angel that you truly are.