Can you imagine being able to ask someone to help you with you needs without feeling confrontational? Can you imagine what a conversaton could and/or would really be like without judgment? It seems my son is pretty set that judgment is necessary for his own survival. I would not want to say that this to true for the majority of the people, but all we have to do is look around and start paying attention.
Clearing up our communication comes from understanding responsibility. How do we do this? Well, how many of us have asked a spouse, "Do you want to stop off and get something to eat?" only to hear, "Well, do you?" LOL...it's funny but true. I thought about this the other day when this happened and I thought what did I not make clear that someone would have to ask a question when I asked what appeared to be a simple question. Where is the responsibility in this relationship? Both!
If I had been clear with my husband that I needed to eat something and I would like to have a this or that then he would have had to answer me directly. My husband not willing to take responsibility for making a decision for me didn't want to make one for himself.
And I love this one! Most of the time when we would pull up to the drive thru he would ask me, "What do you want?", I would tell him but only to have him ask me again when the lady said, "Can I help you?" It gets frustrating when someone ask you want you want only to have them ask you again, again, and again. It was like he could not get the order right even when I was saying it directly to him.
There are many reasons that this can happen. One being that the person placing the order is not that tuned into their communciation, which means they are disconnected on so many levels in their relationships. The other thing that is happening is not knowing how to meet the needs of another. Or! It could be they are not used to asking for what they want and now want it to appear that there is only one person needing the food.
If you are interested in learning how to be a better communicator we will be having a class soon. But before we can be clear in our level of communication we must learn how we are judging others. How can we ever learn to appreciate the true gift of telling others what we need when we are judging ourselves.
Judgment class will be help 9/11/10 at 10:30 at the clinic. Please be sure to make a reservation.
Awareness opens the possibility for Alignment and the Willingness to Release. Free yourself of illusions within YOUR reality. What are you creating that makes you feel disempowered?
